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Some days, this socialization to be agreeable and pleasant is definitely a bug.
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Can I rewind and redo the last couple of hours? You know, the part of my day wherein I am profoundly efficient in my poor communication skills and manage to entirely inadvertently piss off lots of people in a very short period of time...

[The first part of my day, where I was with [livejournal.com profile] audioboy, was awesome, but my day seems have rapidly deteriorated once I got home...]

ETA: Thank you to both Chip and [livejournal.com profile] theloriest for being fabulously supportive this evening. :-)
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Local folks:

Looks like Tuesday is probably going to be a snow day, which means I will need childcare my kids for the morning and early afternoon. Anyone willing for me to send my kids over to your house (or take them with you somewhere fun like the MOS)? I will happily babysit for your children lots and lots in return and/or pay you very well indeed.
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Benjamin just unwrapped a chemistry set from my mom, whom I will note lives in a different state...

(Actually he is being meticulously cautious about it, and very carefully following the safety instructions. He wouldn't even let his little brother in the room without safety goggles.)
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It really is immensely hard to concentrate when two kids are giggling and gleefully shouting with great enthusiasm as they are working on building the most ridiculous things they possibly can in Minecraft.
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Apparently part of my job includes being out in the torrential rain for an hour or more at a time on a regular basis. (Um, yeah, I know, WTF...)

I need truly waterproof rain gear, both rain pants and a raincoat. Turns out this is super extra hard to find in plus sizes, particularly plus sizes for short people. People keep pointing me to things that are not actually waterproof or don't exist in nearly large enough sizes for me.

For now I am wearing shorts and a rain poncho (which I have used on numerous hikes for 25 years but has already torn from catching on things after wearing it twice at work). The rain poncho and shorts thing sort of kind of works, but eventually it is going to be 35 degrees and pouring and this will not work so well.

I need I think about a 24 in rain pants, or maybe 26 since it has to go over my clothes, and something like a 26 or 28 in rain coat. Larger is always better, so I can layer under it as needed. The rain pants are the most critical element here, as I suppose I *could* keep buying rain ponchos and using them until they tore. I would really like to have both though, as constantly going through rain ponchos is both seriously expensive and seriously wasteful.

Also, advice needed from folks who have regularly worn waterproof clothing: How does one make sure it dries entirely between uses, especially on the inside, so it does not mildew? And how does one clean it without damaging the waterproofing if it does mildew?
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Meanwhile, Chip is now on a new antibiotic, and apparently if he has not shown some unspecified degree of improvement when he shows up for tomorrow morning's dose of IV antibiotics the next step is hospitalization.

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So Chip is in the ER waiting for IV antibiotics for cellulitis in his leg. This would I believe be the fifth time this has happened with no apparent injury in the last decade, increasing in frequency over the last few years. (Then there was the infected hangnail that didn't respond to heavy duty doses of oral doxycyline and eventually needed a different antibiotic via IV, but I believe that may not have technically been diagnosed as cellulitis.)

He just let me know they are doing a vascular ultrasound just to double check there isn't something even more exciting, and then presumably IV antibiotics.

I am doing a really good job of being calm for the kids.

But meanwhile there is this thing where I am not actually coherent and everything I say in a written form comes out really terse and needs repeated editing not to sound unintentionally seriously cranky...

And apparently my reading comprehension seriously sucks under stress too...
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At this moment I am having the impulse to hide my head under my pillow and hope that my childcare problems with resolve themselves if I just ignore them long enough.

That being vanishingly unlikely, however, I am hoping the hive mind will generate some solution that has not yet occurred to me.

So Mondays I now work until 5:15, but my younger child's school Extended Day program closes at 4:30. There is a bus that runs from close by Chip's work to close by the school. The plan had been for Chip to leave work at 4:00 (which is not fabulous but maybe ok once a week), because I am certain when I checked the bus schedule there was a bus that would have gotten him there in time. Bus schedule (whether because I mis-read it or because it has changed) would now require him to leave at 3:30. This suddenly looks like a *far* less feasible plan, because at least in my head this now crosses a line from "leave a little early once a week" to "leave super early once a week". (*Possibly* I could find someone to reliably bring Squiggle to me once a week, and if I can that is what I will probably do. Someone responsible and willing to consistently commit to that is difficult to find, however, and my cost of Monday childcare pretty much already exceeds what I am earning on that day without the added expense.)

What clever solution am I overlooking?

Extra bonus childcare dilemma: After school care for my older kid ends at 5:30, so if I have the car and the traffic co-operates I can just barely get him in time. (This is already a little fraught.) He only has the option of after school care on Mondays, however. (Younger kid can stay for Extended Day T/W/Th if there is space, in addition to having a guaranteed spot every Monday.) Generally I leave work at 2:00 on other days, which allows me to get both kids in time from their respective schools. I seem to need to work until 5:15 far more often than I anticipated on other days, however, *and* on Fridays my younger kid's school does not have Extended Day and closes at 2:30. For extra fun, my older kid really likes the after school program at his school that he does on Mondays (possibly partially because he seems to manage to abandon his homework at school those days due to minimal supervision *sigh*) and so is being astoundingly sullen about other options (and does not seem to be parsing that he doesn't *have* that option any other day).
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Can't actually remember the last time I was this tired. This new work/school schedule is going to be seriously challenging.
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My older kid is designing increasingly impressive structures with Minecraft. It has also become a huge point of social connection with other kids, something that fills him and them with such shared enthusiasm and joy and has really helped build and deepen a lot of his friendships with other kids. He just lights up talking about it with me and everyone else.

This fills my geeky little soul with utter delight while at the same time I sometimes want to chase him outside to play in the gorgeous weather and wish he was getting more exercise than he is. (I don't usually chase him outside, but I do try a lot find things to do as a family we all really enjoy, like going to the zoo.)

Parenting is complicated. Emotions around parenting are even more complicated. I think all I can do is try to hold onto what I always told other parents when I was teaching and they would go to me for advice. While there are wrong things one can do, there are a lot of often mutually exclusive right things one can do. He is happy in a way hasn't been before, so I silence the voice that chews at me saying pedantically he shouldn't be on the computer that much, and try to look at the kid through the lens of what *he* is finding nourishes him and not the lens of what I have been taught are the rules of how I should parent him.

But I don't know what lens is right and I don't really have an answer. I would probably tell any other parent that was fine, that there are many paths and to trust in the kid and ones instincts, and that perfection is unattainable and irrelevant, but my emotions on this are complicated and somewhat fraught.
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I shall take a moment to whine about how overwhelming I am finding the approximately seven million pieces of work related email I must address, before making more tea and beginning to hack at them with the blunt instrument of my slowly caffeinating brain...
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Just got back from staying out way too late with [livejournal.com profile] hammercock going to Davis Square for ice cream. Which was so very very very exactly what I needed right now. She is made of awesome, and it was completely fabulous to get to spend time with her. :-)
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OMG I love Chip so very very very much. Because reasons.

(I mean, I guess I always do, but extra awesome Chip is being extra made of awesomeness and appropriate snark and serious supportive awesomeness right now)
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If, say, your exceedingly independent four year old were to attempt to make himself an impressively large volume of a version of chocolate milk (using maple syrup!) while you were busy elsewhere in the house, and then, I expect due to the weight, were to drop it, covering most of the kitchen floor, how would you go about cleaning it? It appears his culinary science experiment has created a substance of immensely tenacious stickiness, and washing it several times has been virtually useless.
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Today's awesomeness:
Breakfast with [livejournal.com profile] lyonesse (which actually lasted well into lunchtime!). It was so fabulous to get to chat with her for several hours! :-)

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Chip built a giant space into the new pantry shelves for all my tea! :-)
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Among assorted good things today:
Chip installed the fancy new sliding shelves he built for the pantry!

(And then he immediately carefully put his liquor collection back on the new shelves. The man has his priorities!) :-)
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Extra bonus good thing:
The kids fell asleep soon into our return journey, so Chip and I got lots of time to talk without interruption.

(Giggling and gossiping and silliness, oh my...). :-)

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Today's good thing:

Chip and I singing along with music I really like on the way home. I haven't done that for far too long!

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