(no subject)

[gosling]

If one more relative tells embarrassing stories from my youth I don't even remember or looks askance at me for actually eating food (rather than I suppose attempting to subsist solely by photosynthesis) I may just lose my mind

Comments

[bikergeek.livejournal.com]

Ugh. *sends you strength*

[miraclaire.livejournal.com]

Why do they think there is food if not to eat it? Memorials can be incredibly draining, and you need to replenish your energy from somewhere.

[gosling.livejournal.com]

Photosynthesis apparently. *sigh*
These are the relatives who are definitely of the philosophy that virtuous women don't eat.

[miraclaire.livejournal.com]

The mind boggles. My family is very much the opposite -- everyone must be eating all the time, and refusing offered food is a mortal sin.

There is an oft-told family story about my great-grandfather's funeral. My mom, aunt, and uncles all flew into Philadelphia and met at the airport. They had some time to kill before the funeral, so they decided to go get cheesesteak, since it had been so long since any of them had had the real thing. They ate a TON. When they got to the cemetery for the service, my great-aunt greeted them with "We got some enormous deli plates for back at the house, so I hope you're hungry!" and they all dutifully replied "Yes, Aunt Charlotte, we're starving." (ok, maybe it's not so funny written out?). Anyway, seems to be the opposite problem of what you're dealing with :/

[gosling.livejournal.com]

I actually suspect they may be rebelling against exactly that in their parents' generation. But I am just so not willing to perform the role of virtuous fat person (and really they expect this of people of all sizes; what changes is the intensity with which one is expected to subsist on water vapor).

[hammercock.livejournal.com]

Fuck. That.

*hugs*

[achinhibitor.livejournal.com]

These are the relatives who are definitely of the philosophy that virtuous women don't eat.

Probably more that they don't eat in public.

I remember reading of some event for female college students, reported on by a male reporter IIRC. During one of the meals, the student who was his "guide" at the event cued him in that nobody wanted to be the one who ate the most of all the women at her table.

But social prestige is often fought for by such silly contests.

You can be free of their expectations, but the price is having to not care what they think. Give them that squinty-eyed Have you lost your mind? look...

[eiblyn.livejournal.com]

There's nothing I hate more than the embarrassing story bit. I actually started giving it back a few years ago and suddenly the people who remembered all of my embarrassing moments remembered that they have some too! Not really appropriate at a memorial, but very satisfying to think about!

[larksdream]

I hate it too. Maybe there are some families where it's all in fun, but in mine it's part of their weird power plays where they win every time they get to make someone feel bad while denying that that was what they meant to do.

[oneagain.livejournal.com]

That sounds awful. I'm so sorry.

When people give me nonsense, which is pretty much never, I look at them like they are aliens and they stop. Which might explain the pretty much *never* part.

[gosling.livejournal.com]

I figured it would cause more trouble than it was worth on this occasion, but, yeah, it is generally an excellent strategy

[achinhibitor.livejournal.com]

Isn't that the purpose of elderly relatives, to tell embarrassing (to them, endearing) anecdotes about your childhood? Wait twenty years and tell your kid's friends the cute stories...

Oy

[drwex]

Just... oy.

Re: Oy

[gosling.livejournal.com]

yeah, pretty much. *sigh*